Budgets.

Ok. So yes, I'm putting it all out there for the world to see, but I need to do this for three reasons:
1) Reality Check (helps me not freak out)
2) Accountability
3) Help me make goals, and even better: achieve them

Every Dollar has a name. It will change over the next few months, but I think this is a good start. Any feed back or anything? go for it. I can take it :P

RL sucks

So, I have deiced to axe my 401k contributions until I pay off my credit card, which shouldn't bee too much longer (Less than $3k to go).

I also am in quite a crunch with my private student loan, with no option to restructure payments right now, and no one buying student loans at a cheaper rate.
This leaves me with two options as I see right now:

#1 find some kind soul who wishes to invest in my student loan at 4% over 20 years (effectively paying it off for me, and I make a $300 a month payment to them).

#2 Get a second job as a waitress or something on the weekends (a job where I can make tips). If you know of anything, let me know.

It was stupid of me to take out so many loans. I'm definitely kicking myself in the ass for it. And my "after college job" certainly isn't paying what I expected it would.

yay for stupidity, debt reduction, and determination.
pray for guidance, extra money and faith that there is a light at the end of this very long tunnel.

Debt Reduction

As it stands, I will probably pay off my student loans when I'm about 55 (scary). I want to do it MUCH sooner than that (if I had my way, I'd pay $1000 a month and pay it off in 10 years, or 75ish payments).

Chris and I are working very hard on being frugal right now. I know there are a few more things I could cut out (ie eating out. period).

Right now my company contributes 2% to my 401(k) - and I contribute 4% (they would contribute 0-1 if i go below the 4%). Right now that is about $120 per month.

What is your take on holding off on 401(k) contributions while in debt reduction? That money can go a long way.

Managing and Budgeting

Ok, you that are following me know that I am a HUGE worrier. I get it from my grandmother. I admit. I have like four worry-stones.

How do you guys budget and stay on track? I just struggle with it. And then I worry more than I should worry.

Sometimes I think man if we could only buy a house and be able to help our taxes that way. Maybe we should move to a smaller place, maybe we shouldn't use our lights, on and on and on.

I use Quicken Online to help track where everything goes (although it's not perfect, it's like the only one that will auto update my bank, without me having to manually do it all the time). And I've been come a bit of a finance blog whore.

Balls to the Wall

...as my favorite personal finance blog, Get Rich Slowly, said today - you can try and get out of debt by doing it half-assed. You have to be committed. Here are some of the things I want to commit to, and some of my struggles:

1) Student Loans in forbearance until August. My LARGE loan cannot be put off anymore. I've already used up all the forbearance/deferment options. However, I am going to try and renegotiate a lower payment. I don't know how I'm going to do it when I have to pay those again.

2) Chris' business is uncertain, which means that I pick up the slack on things like utilities and groceries.

3)I've given myself (as a treat to myself) one meal a week that I can eat out. I track all my expenses on Quicken Online which lets me set budgets and such. Categorizing things is EYE OPENING. I had money LEFT OVER after last paycheck, and it was because I didn't eat out or buy unnecessary groceries (ie beer lol).

4) My goal was to pay off my credit card by July. I have about $3k to go (with some of it being Chris' debt as well). I have made 3 payments so far this month, but it is going to be tough.

5) I also opened a high interest savings account with GMAC (now Ally) at 2.25%APR, which is the highest one I have found so far. The Get Rich Slowly Blog has a good list of different online savings accounts if you're interested in checking them out. Currently, every Friday, $10 is taken out of my bank account and put into this savings account.

6) I have found this great website called E-meals, which plans out your weekly meals and groceries based on the stores sales, and gives you a shopping list. The weekly expense for two people is $35 (unless you have some of the staples already). Meal planning is a great way to save money, and not waste food. I'm also making myself take lunch to work, or go home for lunch.

I think if I keep telling everyone I'm working my way out of debt and want to be able to have the "wants" someday, it will make things easier. I really crumble to peer pressure sometimes (eating out, meeting for drinks, going clothes shopping). It's hard to tell someone that you don't have the cash and you won't use your credit card (I only use mine now for work expenses which are reimbursed, the other one is cut up).

I also want to find a job on the weekends. yes, I have PartyLite, but I struggle keeping up the momentum (4 parties in one month canceled and that really buggered me up.) I will continue to seek out customers and have open houses and such. Any one who has ideas on Saturday/Sunday job or where to get your liquor license would be great. Earning tips would be great.

Ok that is all for now. Exercising more is still on the list :)

Habits

I'm trying to start some good ones (mostly for health reasons).
Today I've had four glasses of water already. Four more to go (to keep with the goal in my head).

I'd like to exercise at least three times a week. Bicycle and Wii Fit (Friday I did 20 minutes on the bike and 24 minutes on the Wii).

I have GOT to stop eating out! I think if I keep track of what I'm eating better, I might realise how gross it is! (ie I went to Taco Bell today, cos I was hungry at 11 and already ate my sandwich and my peach... so I got a crunchwrap at 2...)

Also, get my face under control WITHOUT having to go to the dermatologist. I've got a few things to do. But it's gotta wait til next paycheck.

Another thing. Paying off my credit cards and loans. I'm making myself a Zero Balance budget. It's gonna take some discipline. But I think I can do it. It's hard when you are around people that spend money!

Fridays

...are always bad for me, as well as Mondays.

I am always the most stressed, end up staying late, when everyone says leave early. BUT I HAVE STUFF TO DO!

And my favortie engineer was laid off today, so I'm sad.

On a brighter note: I shared my "brain dump" with our VP, and he actually LIKED it. Even wants to implements some of it.

Candybar?

Wasted Week

This week has felt like treading water. I didn't go forward in anything. I didn't even go backwards. As the vegetables, potatoes, meat and finally the dessert pile onto my plate every day, I wonder if I can eat it all. I start to get full, but I keep eating.

It's difficult when it seems no one sees things from your point of view. Or if they refuse to.

This is where the good attitude comes in, right?

At what point do you just... go in the bathroom and puke it all up?

Past Boredom (from my old, lame blog)

Your heart is racing, who are you standing next to?
Probably Chris. Or a robber. (fluttering for different reasons of course).

Are you easily scared by horror movies?
yes. I hate them. It's not cos I think they are scary, but because they give me really terribly f*d up dreams.

Do you still turn to your parents for advice or comfort?
Advice, sometimes about finances. Comfort, sure. probably not enough.

If someone gave you 100 dollars, would you spend or save it?
I would make a payment on my credit card, so technically it was spent a long time ago lol.

When you shut off your alarm clock, do you tend to fall back asleep?
I always fall back asleep. I tend to sleep through my alarms too, or re-set it later and later.

Are you hiding something important from someone?
Well, like I'm going to tell everyone my "important" things. Now if it was "someone you love" that might be a different story. And depends on who.

Have you ever had a pet fish?
Yes. several. The last one was Spike, a beta fish who died a very tragic death (tho I don't know if it was more traumatic for him or for me).

Are you taller than 5'5"?
No.

What were you doing at 9 this morning?
Staring at my computer at work. Reading the news.

Can you admit when you're wrong?
Yeah. It's hard. But I'm used to looking like a fool.

Do you like to argue?
I don't like to. But if I know I'm right, I'll try. If it's just stupid lover quarrels, I hate them but I always pick them cos apparently I'm crazy. But I'm usually pretty passive-aggressive.

Is it possible for you to be pregnant?
Ummm....God I hope not.

Describe your life in one word?
Weird

Do you cuss a lot?
indeed

Is there a girl that knows everything or mostly everything about you?
Well. Between Julie and Katie and my sister, they probably know *almost* everything

Do you trust all of your friends?
true friends yes. There are some that call ME their friend and I do not trust them. It takes a lot for me to really trust someone.

Have you lost contact with someone you wish you didn't?
Yup. A few actually

Have you ever gotten a sunburn so bad it hurt to move?
Yes. Second degree on my shoulder in Jr. High.

Who are your favorite people to talk to when you’re down?
Usually Chris or my sister. Chris doesn't always like to hear it. Same with my sister. But the both listen.

Is there someone you will never forget?
yes. sometimes I wish I would.

Do you like country music?
no so much

What were you doing last night at midnight?
in the shower.

Are you good at giving directions?
It used to be my job. I better be good at it.


Rent a movie or go to the movies?
Depends on the movie. I'm a Netflix girl though.

If you could seek revenge on someone, would you?
Two words. Bitch Face.

Bonfire or fireplace?
Fireplace

Are any of your mom's siblings married?
All of them, actually.

Do you like to be reassured that you're cared about?
Who doesn't?

Do you clean when you’re upset?
yeah. When my grandma was really sick.. you should have seen how clean my house was.

What's on your mind right now?
GO TO BED. and, man I really want laisik eye surgery.

How have you felt today?
Stressed out, happy, tired, hungry

Does anyone hate you?
Oh I'm sure of it. I have a few guesses too.

Who/what made you happy/smile today?
Chris. Bonnie. Laura.

Do you wear contacts or glasses?
Contacts

Do you miss the way things used to be?
Somethings yes.

Who was the last person to call you?
My mommy.

Last person you cried in front of?
Chris

Have you held hands with anyone in the past three days?
Chris

Do you like hugs or do you freak when people hug you?
I like hugs. But I freak out when certain people try and hug me. (If I don't know you very well, don't even try). And God forbid you should go for my butt. I will kill you.

Done anything illegal lately?
Me? do something illegal? riiiiiiiight.

Is there any emotion you're trying to avoid right now?
oh... yeah. probably. I have too many emotions. frustration, anger and annoyance seem to be at the top of the list to avoid.

Are you single or taken?
very much taken.

Has your family ever kept a big secret from you?
yes.

What are your worst scars from?
10 pound ovarian cyst.

Something you do a lot?
WoW, work

Who do you trust right now?
I trust some people, with most thing. But no one will ever know everything. I don't even trust myself to do the right thing for ME. How can I then trust others? Didn't we talk about this already? Trust is delicate. It is earned. It has many levels. So I trust a lot of different people right now, with a lot of different things.

LIfe

Stuff is going on. Life stuff. Job stuff. Friend stuff. Just stuff.

I need to have a good attitude. It's hard, though, sometimes, when things feel like crap. Not that I have a bad life. I have a job. I have a wonderful man. I have a house. and a cat.


I want to fly. I want to talk to foreign people every day. I want to be something great. I want to be appreciated.